The first time I ever sat down to write something about willies (just for you Barren Betty).

Barren Betty, who is a very amusing blogger and artist (check her out if you haven’t already), requested some pictures of penis shaped things. As I have nothing to write about other than my eating habits at the moment I thought I’d oblige.

There are lots of fantastic, interesting, cultural things to do an see in Bang.kok and Tha.iland. Loads of people flock here every years to enjoy the great food, fantastic scenery, beautiful temples etc. And then there are the gross, old men who come with different ‘sights’ they would like to ‘see’.

Here are a few shots of tourist attractions that are probably not worth bothering to see if and when you are ever in Thailand.


Grandfather and Grandmother rock can be found on an otherwise nondescript beach on Koh Samui. There was a bullshit fairytale about how these rocks came to be on the tour which took me there (and other places) but I was too busy wondering why the hell I was participating in this to listen. I think these made the ‘100 things not to do when you’re travelling’ list.


This is not really a tourist attraction but rather a random dick shrine next to a large natural rock climbing wall on Railay beach, Krabi. The old tourists are watching people climb but I don’t think one noticed what he was leaning on. I was really trying not to let him realize why I was taking a picture. A: it feels a bit wrong to lean of the head of a massive shlong and B: I’m pretty sure you shouldn’t lean on anything with offering-like ribbons tied around it. PS. Do check out Railay beach if your in the vicinity. My favorite and one of the most scenic, quiet beaches and amazing climbing.


Bangkok fertility shrine. Feeling infertile? Just head through a few car parks into the deep, dark sois of Bangkok, downtown to find this shrine. Hang a circle of flowers on the phallus of your choice, give it a rub for luck and say a prayer. Not scientifically shown to help with actual conception but probably no weirder than half the other stuff we’ve done in the name of babies, right? Ps. I haven’t done this…yet.

Well that’s about all the cock this lesbian can handle for one day (stop giggling and pick your mind out of the gutter!). Hope you enjoyed it Betty (and anyone else who wasn’t put of by the title 🙂 )


PS. If you arrived here by searching for something gross on google, shame on you!


8 thoughts on “The first time I ever sat down to write something about willies (just for you Barren Betty).

  1. Ahahaha!!!! I snorted out my breakfast reading this. I can’t believe you wrote something about willies for the first time for me…*love*… Those grandmother and grandfather rocks are simultaneously the best and worst things I ever seen in my life.

  2. brilliant! I have actually been to the grandfather/grandmother rocks and was suitably underwhelmed! Although unfortunately I haven’t been to Krabi….next time.
    I wish there were a bunch of penises I could go and rub to improve my fertility….erm, wait…I think that’s what happened to quite a few girls from my school!

  3. Haha until Betty went on vacation, I had no idea there were so many penis things in the world (and vagina rocks apparently). Now all any of us will be looking for are trees, rocks and bushes (no pun intended) shaped like genitalia.

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